Burnout Recovery Isn't Just About Rest - It's About Living By Your Values
- jennamcgonegal
- Dec 28, 2025
- 4 min read
Updated: Jan 2
In the burnout recovery world, we often hear about slowing down, resting more, and regulating the nervous system. These practices matter - deeply.
But there’s a crucial piece that’s often missing. One that can help you recover from burnout and build a life that actually feels fulfilling:
Living in alignment with your values.
One of the most overlooked causes of burnout is living a life that quietly contradicts what matters most to you.
Think about it.
If you spend 40 hours a week in a job where your creativity is stifled, your work feels meaningless, or you’re isolated from others, it makes sense that you’d feel exhausted, empty, or dread-filled.
Or if life becomes all “must-dos” - earning money, managing a home, meeting expectations - with little space for your “love-to-dos” like connection, play, or growth, you may start to feel numb. Like you’re just going through the motions.
Rest can help you cope with burnout. Values help prevent it from returning.
What Are Values, Really?
Values are freely chosen, ongoing ways of being that guide you toward the person you want to be and the life you want to live.
Let’s break that down.
Values are freely chosen.Values are a lot like your favourite kind of pizza: some love pepperoni, others prefer veggie or Hawaiian. There’s no right or wrong. What matters is that they’re yours. Values can’t be inherited, assigned, or chosen based on what you think you should care about.
Values are ongoing processes.They aren’t destinations. Running a marathon is a goal. Growth, challenge, or vitality might be the values underneath it. The beauty of values is that you can live them in many different ways, and you can return to them at any time.
Values guide you.Think of values as a compass. They help you decide how to act, what to prioritize, and who you want to be - especially when life gets hard.
Values evolve.What mattered most to you at 16 may look very different at 40. Values can shift across seasons of life, and that’s not a failure, it’s growth.
Why Do We Drift Away From Our Values?
There are many reasons we lose touch with what matters to us. You might recognize one or more of these.
You were never taught to identify them.
This is especially common for people-pleasers and high-achievers. If you spent years focused on keeping others happy or avoiding conflict, there may not have been space to ask: What actually matters to me?
You learned to abandon your values to stay safe.
If caregivers dismissed, mocked, or punished certain values, you may have learned early on to hide them. When survival is at stake, values often come second.
Cultural pressure plays a role.
In many Western, capitalistic societies, dominant values include productivity, competition, and material success, which often conflict with human needs for rest, connection, and meaning.
Unprocessed emotions pull you off course.
When we don’t know how to make space for emotions like fear, guilt, or anxiety, they can quietly run the show. You might value connection, for example, but avoid it because anxiety feels overwhelming.
How to Live in Alignment With Your Values for Lasting Burnout Recovery
1. Clarify your values
Try reflecting on questions like:
When do I feel most like myself?
Who do I admire, and what qualities stand out?
What do I hope loved ones would say about me?
What consistently frustrates or hurts me, and why? *This why likely points to your values.
You can also use guided imagery:
Imagine your 80th birthday (or your funeral, if you're comfortable with morbidity). What do people say about who you were and how you showed up? The themes that emerge often point directly to your values.
Values lists can help too: choose 5–10 that resonate with you. You may notice a feeling of calm, quiet excitement, or warmth in your body when you read them.
2. Look for small, meaningful shifts
Values don’t require drastic life changes. Start small - choose 1-2 core values you'd like to prioritize, and explore ways you can demonstrate these values more regularly. If you value adventure, that might mean taking a new walking route - or planning a big trip.If you value compassion, it could be listening more deeply to a loved one or volunteering.
Small shifts, practiced consistently, can dramatically reduce burnout.
3. Anticipate barriers
Living by your values often brings discomfort. Fear, guilt, “shoulds,” lack of time, or pushback from others are common.
Planning ahead helps. Ask:
What might get in the way?
How will I respond when obstacles show up?
4. Consider support
Therapy can be incredibly helpful when values feel unclear or hard to live by.
A therapist can help you:
clarify your values without pressure or judgment
set realistic, values-aligned goals
navigate guilt, anxiety, or fear that arises when you start choosing yourself
Final Thoughts
Burnout isn’t just about doing too much.Often, it’s about living a life that doesn’t reflect who you are.
If you’re ready to move toward more fulfillment, purpose, and connection - in a supportive, nonjudgmental space - I’m currently accepting new clients
in Ontario.
You can book a free consultation using the link below.
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