PEOPLE-PLEASING + PERFECTIONISM

Many of my clients come to therapy feeling drained from trying to meet unreasonably high expectations, get everything “just right”, or avoid disappointing others. You may be very capable and conscientious, yet constantly battling self-criticism, guilt, or the sense that you’re falling short.

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People-pleasing and perfectionism often develop as ways to stay safe, valued, or in control, but over time, they can take a real toll on your wellbeing and connection with yourself.

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Therapy can help you loosen these patterns and relate to yourself with more compassion and flexibility.

 

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PEOPLE-PLEASING + PERFECTIONISM

CAN SHOW UP AS:

• Difficulty setting or maintaining boundaries

• Feeling responsible for keeping others happy

• Harsh self-criticism and chronic guilt

• Fear of making mistakes

• Tying self-worth to productivity or performance

• Feeling resentful, depleted, or stretched too thin​​

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NEXT STEPS:

We’ll begin by identifying the patterns that keep you stuck and the costs they’ve had on your life. From there, we’ll work toward building a more sustainable, self-respecting way of relating to yourself and others.

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For clients that want to work more directly with the root of these patterns, I use trauma-informed approaches such as Accelerated Resolution Therapy (ART) to support processing earlier experiences that continue to shape guilt, self-criticism, and over-responsibility.